Wednesday, January 21, 2009

moving, moving, moving! 

as of today, i will no longer be found at this blog.  my new blog is...

Friday, January 16, 2009

I cried today. It caught me by surprise. I came across this photo...

This is at my brother's house a year ago in January 08. Chris (with lots of help from my other bro Brad and Chris's then fiance Liz) decorated it with my grandparents' bar and assorted bar paraphenalia that that they had in their party room. They named it "Harry's bar" and brought Granddaddy over to see his bar with the next generation. They rushed the project because they wanted it done in time for him to see it. He was diagnosed with an inoperable brain tumor in fall of 07 and was failing rapidly.

May 10, 2008 he left our world and joined his Father in heaven.

I mourned his death, of course, but I also knew he was ready to go. He loved his family more than life itself, but he knew where he was going and that he would see all of us again. I knew that, too. So, though I missed him, I was okay.

And, then I came upon the pictures from my brother's blog. I clicked on the slide show and settled in for a trip down memory lane. It wasn't the first time that I've seen pics of him or anything- they're all around our houses. What got me was the thought that he never got to see my new house. And, then I lost it.

I don't think it's even that he didn't get to see the house as much as, in one split second, I realized all the things he wouldn't be there for... to be at my wedding, to see my children. He wouldn't be there to giggle at our Christmas shenanigans or our next huge family gathering.

I just really missed him all of a sudden. But, more than that, I missed what he wouldn't be able to be a part of in the future.

I miss you, Granddaddy. Until we meet again.

Thursday, January 1, 2009

I'm an ambitious girl.  I don't say that to brag, it's just true.  I don't like getting a B when I know I can get an A.  I don't want to be a good teacher, I want to be the best.  I don't want to be a good Christian, I want to be an awesome one.  It's just the way I am, for better or worse.  I'm starting to come to grips with that.

So, my type A personality loves, loves, loves new beginnings.  I love the start of the school year, the new year, even Advent, the start of the church year.  I love Lent, too, but that's a whole other story.  It's a time to start over and become more perfect, right?  Become an even better me.

And, of course, I love me some resolutions.  My track record these past few years have been pretty decent, too.  Buy a house in 2008?  check.  Read the Bible in 2006?  check.  (There's been others that I've failed miserably at as well, but we're not focusing on those right now!)  And, although they've all helped me reach goals or made me a better person, that's not what I'm looking for this year.  

I want to remember 2009.  Do things out of my comfort zone.  Make memories I'll treasure for life.  So, I'm making a list of things to do in 2009.  It's not neccessarily anything individually that makes me a better person, but I think, as a whole, I will be.

So, here's my list:

1. Run a mile without stopping to walk.
2. Take a trip to Glen Rose to come face to face with the animal that terrifies me.  (It's also just a way cool place.)
3. Host a get-together every month.  I worked too hard for this house to not share it with everybody.
4. Wear my sassy shoes.  Bring comfy shoes to work for planning period if neccessary, but break out those babies!
5. Take a continuing ed class about art or photography.  I've been "meaning" to do this for years, and it's about time!
6.  Travel outside the state... where?  I don't know, but I don't travel near as much as I want to.
7.  Switch out a chemical I use for one that's more eco-friendly.  (I've bookmarked tons of recipes for cleaners, but if you've got one you love, please share!)

more to come, I'm sure, but here's what I got so far.  What resolutions do you have?